my soul waits..

I find it compelling that ever since husband man and I were in Africa and the thought of adopting a baby first was spoken, this song has been in my head and on my heart...

i.just.can't.shake.it. {not that I even want to, but if I did there would be no hope for me..}

do I know what it means? no. Am I trusting God that it will all be in his timing and the perfect baby for us will be ours? Yes.

{{and, while I wait I will be one who dreams....}}

Those who dream

When the Lord brought back the captives ones of zion
we are like those who dream
and our mouths were filled with laughter
and our tongues with joyful shouting

when the Lord brought back the captives ones of zion
we are like those who dream
and our mouths were filled with laughter
and our tongues with joyful shouting

we will say...... among the nations
the Lord has done great things
we will say among the nations
the Lord has done great things

More then the watchmen wait for the morning
our souls wait
our souls wait upon the Lord
for with Him, His love and kindess
and abundent redemption

we will say among the nations
the Lord has done great things
we will say among the nations
the Lord has done great things

cause those who sew in tears
will reap in joyfull shouting ...

Song by Krystene Mueller

My dear sweet baby,

On tuesday I sent off our home-study paperwork. One step closer to finishing our to do list. One step closer to meeting you and holding you in my arms for the very first time....

I think of you often. I wonder if you will be a tiny little man or a sweet baby girl. I wonder what we'll name you, and what you'll look like. I think of getting my first picture of you, and finally putting a face and a name to our first little one. I can't wait until you are in my arms forever.

I pray everyday that your being held and loved. I hope someone is kissing you goodnight {like I did with so many sweet babies} and praying for your future mommy and daddy to find you. I pray that you'll love us the moment you meet us, and we'll know, without a doubt that your the one.

I've found sparkle shoes for you if you are a sweet baby girl , shoe's that I'll buy the instant I get home. And if your a tiny little man instead, I've already bought you your first hat. It's darling and I'm sure you'll love it and never want to take it off.

I love you more then you know already. I can't wait to kiss your little checks and tell you your home. Forever. And that I'm never ever going to stop loving you.

xoxo and pancakes,

Mommy

stockings are best when their b.i.g.

When I was liittle girl, my mom made all of us kids matching stockings for Christmas. They were beautiful. Perfect. And uniquely ours...

...so now, now that I'm about to be a mommy, I've been looking for special stockings for my little family...

..and I found these little gems on etsy... {which fyi is my favorite website ever }

and yes, I do plan on buying enough for Mogley and Lexi too...



made by rikrak.

Happy going to get a Christmas tree day!

xoxo

I shall make a table out of the books I own...

A few nights ago, after our home study still hadn't come in the mail, and I was itching to do anything, something, I went online looking for one particular book that my sister, Rissa, had told me about. It's called there is no me without you, and literally made me cry reading the review on the book. I can't wait to have it...

So.

So, I went online to Amazon and bought it as quickly as I could. {because that very night I went to two different bookstores and neither had it in stock..} and then, while I was at it, {and frankly a bit bored} I started looking at baby books for baby ... {because everyone knows, baby can never have too many books!}

and I got..

..one of my very favorite books, Shaoey and Dot. It's about a little girl, waiting in an orphanage for parents and the little ladybug who watches over here. Seriously, if you haven't read it, you need to. I cried my eyes out the first time I read it to Elijah and Elizabeth. {and, while I'm being brutally honest, the second, third and fourth time too.. }

and then, of course I had to get Love You Forever. I love this book, and I love reading it. {especially when you are rocking a baby back and forth, back and forth...}

and, then, I need some reading material for me and husband man about our future baby and the adjustments baby will go through, right?!?

So, I got a few..

...in all, I actually bought eleven books for me and Ry and four for baby . But, the best part about Amazon is they sell used books. I actually got one for 50 cents plus shipping...

amazing...I tell you, simply amazing.

{and if need be, I shall make side tables out of all the books we now own. }

xoxo

and there shall be elephants..

I bought this a rather long ago. Right after we got back from Uganda.

.....I found it one day on etsy and I couldn't not have it.

Isn't it marvelous?

book for baby

Dear Baby,
I got an email saying our home study packet was supposed to be mailed yesterday. Which, by my calculations means it should of arrived today. I couldn't wait to get home. I ran all the way to the mailbox, hoping it was in there. But it wasn't..

I'm a bit bummed. All I really want is to start it already, finish it, and mail it back off. I am ready to have you home, because even though I haven't met you yet, I love you. I wonder what you are doing and where you are...if your being held and loved on. I wonder if anyone is telling you that you are special....if your sad and sick or happy and healthy....

I wonder if the second I see you I will know you are to be mine. I wonder if you'll know it and feel it too. I wonder if you call me mommy or mama or mom? ... if you'll like to snuggle and have books read to you...

I hope you do, because bath time and bedtime is my favorite time of the day. I can't wait to dress you in footsie pajamas, pull you into my lap and rock you back and forth, back and forth...

I bought you a book today baby. I can't wait to read it to you.

I love you.

Me



{{and, because I can't buy clothes or toys for baby, I am settling on buying other things ... like this lovely book. It's a must get for everyone. and it will make you laugh. at least go to barnes and nobles and take a gander. it is totally worth the drive. promise. }}

"this one's jussssssst right..."

...

looking at cribs online I felt like Goldilocks ...

Too girly. Too small. Too big. Too round. Too brown. Bad brown...

all I have ever wanted was a white, square crib...

...and then, wonder of wonders, this one caught my eye...

it's just right. Perfection maybe even...



Crib for baby.

Matilda Jane...

...if I have any say about it, my little girl will wear Mitilda Jane every. single. day.

Pajama's!

Paul frank pajama's are my favorite for babies ! After all, who can resist a cuddly little baby in monkey pj's??

..and um, check out those ears on the hood!!!

yes, small paul is divine...

art for baby

My dear baby,

I bought this for your room today, just so you'll always remember...

I love you already.

xoxo

Baby book for baby

Last night I was sleeping perfectly fine, and then I thought a thought and all I could think was that thought.

and I was wide awake, staring into the dark...

I couldn't fall back asleep because I was wondering...

I had realized that baby needs a baby book too, and couldn't get out of my mind if they even make them for babies who are two or three? Seriously I tossed and turned all worried..

finally I fell back asleep thinking, if they didn't have one I would make my own!

and so this morning {like all good mommies to be} I researched.

And I found.

Adoption baby books! How cute is that?!?

absolutely adoring this right now...

xoxo

Oh it is love...

So, today I found what I want, no, need for baby girl's room... isn't it darling??



I'm in {heart} with decals...






and if it's a bouncing baby boy's room instead, then he'll get these lovelies~





you can purchase these darlings here from love mae's store on etsy!

xoxo

.....

So, if your reading this, it's officially official, and we've made our announcement to family and friends. {hooray!}

Yes world, we're ready to be parents. Start a little family. Have a tiny one to tuck into bed and read bedtime stories to...

We're ready to kiss boo boo's better ...and lose sleep at night.

But no, I'm not pregnant. Nor am I planning on being anytime soon...

.... we're adopting our first little one....

and we couldn't be more excited.

we welcome all your prayers and support over the next months of paperwork and tears...

Welcome to our journey...